Reblogging because SASKATCHEWAN STORY TIME.
Okay, so: Cows are very stupid and small-time cattle and dairy farmers usually leave them out to pasture. There is a giant-assed river running through Saskatchewan, called the Saskatchewan River. (Saskatchewan was named after the Cree words “Kisiskatchewani Sipi” which means “swift-flowing river,” so it’s Kind Of A Thing. Anyway.) True to its namesake, the river is fast and generally pretty deadly.
… So cows, more or less being walking stomachs, will regularly try to graze by the side of the river, fall in, and drown. The body parts and/or bones wash down the river and through Regina… where Very Concerned Citizens call the police to report “what looks like human bones” washed up on the riverside.
…Even though a cow femur is about three times the size of a human one.
…Even though cow vertebrae are about the size of a hockey puck.
…Even though a cow skull is often five or six metres away. (Which is ignored and taken home as an “Indian artefact.” /facepalm)
Fuckin’ city folk, man.
Reblogging this response because a Canadian is using a hockey puck as a standard unit of measurement.
I had to have 96 rocks surgically removed from my tummy after eating them at the dog park.
The doctors were nice enough to give the expensive rocks to mommy afterwards.
I ate a rock, and broke dad’s wallet.